Top 10 Things Not to Say to an Off-Duty Cop

10. (While the off-duty cop is standing in line at Lowe’s wearing cargo shorts, an old T-shirt, is sweating and has a basket full of yard supplies.): “You off today?”

9. “You ain’t got a gun on now, do you?”

8. “Lemme ask you about this ticket I got last week…”

7. “What happened at that call _______________________?” Insert any event you may have heard of that occured while the cop was off that he could care absolutely less about.

6. “If I told you I had some dope on me right now, could you really still arrest me?”

5. “Wish I could take off work in the middle of the week (said to an officer that just finsihed a weekend of 12 hour shifts, 12 hours of overtime, and a part-time job).

4. “How much money do ya’ll get for each ticket you write?” (Just FYI – it goes to the courts and schools except for $2 that goes to the NC State Law Enforcement Retirement Fund.

3. “You got your handcuffs with you?”

2. “Saw you going fast through town the other day? Were you headed to lunch?”

1. “Now, if I was a cop…”